Sometimes, I do wish I could done that. I reality I feels like I already messed up my life so much that now I realize I've been wasting so much time chasing something that I could not get.

For instance, I should have been using all my time taking more course than sitting around and doing nothing. Instead of relying to some "person" and pretending that they will not collapse. I'm not blaming anybody but myself. Well, all is done now. Life must go on. If only I made my mind up 3 years ago, surely I already sitting at another place blogging another things rather than this self pity post. Heck, even disability insurance of mine would be paid by someone.

All that I can do now, is just keep on make a living with family.-sigh-

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